As much as date? The numerous challenges of dating over 50 in Southern Florida

By Robyn A. Friedman

City & Shore Magazine

I’m later for a gathering, and I’m sitting in traffic. Might as well make use of that right time productively, we figure, therefore I grab my smartphone, available an application and begin swiping.

Too old. Swipe left. Never ever hitched. Nope, swipe left. Spelling mistakes. A no that is definite.

Then We see him. Handsome, high, well-educated, professional, everyday lives near by. use a weblink Swipe right.

This really is my entire life, given that I’ve re-joined the singles scene the very first time much more decades I might add, since my husband passed away suddenly two years ago than I care to discuss — involuntarily. And, since we work at home and don’t are able to satisfy people in person, I’m now searching when it comes to guy of my aspirations online and by using smartphone apps with names like Bumble, Hinge, okay Cupid and Coffee Meets Bagel. You can find ratings more too, like the Match that is better-known, a great amount of Fish, eHarmony and Tinder.

Have a look at any of the web sites or apps, and you’ll soon understand you can find indeed a good amount of fish within the online ocean. But we have actuallyn’t caught mine, yet.

Southern Florida Dating Challenges

Things are challenging right right right here in Southern Florida, since many solitary ladies of every age shall let you know. First, you will find the demographics: there are many women than males right here. That produces a scenario where, as a 50-something friend that is male it: “Robyn, women throw on their own at me personally. ”

Lots of men over 50 are searching for more youthful females. Simply look at the pages on any dating internet site, and you’ll see this doing his thing. And, down here particularly, lots of men over 50 (and certainly most over 60) are retired, which creates an issue for somebody anything like me, whom nevertheless works full-time and it has no intends to retire any time in the future (at the very least until I’m qualified to receive Medicare). All things considered, we can’t travel on a whim, play pickleball through the or enjoy extended lunches at the club at this point in my life afternoon.

Another challenge when it comes to over-50 dater: Females have actually changed. We’re independent, financially stable and, well, type of picky. We’re perhaps not prepared to settle.

“I make use of numerous 50+ women, ” claims Mari Adam, an avowed planner that is financial Boca Raton. “These are successful, smart, economically comfortable females. Various had or nevertheless have severe expert careers, they have been well-educated, and numerous invested a while in business, metropolitan surroundings. Some operate their very own companies. They truly are locating the neighborhood dating pool less than perfect. Although some do meet with the partner that is‘ideal and remarry, or come into another long-lasting relationship, the majority are cheerfully separate and can’t really find anybody age-appropriate who shares their passions and history. ”

Well, that’s encouraging.

Let’s get back to that handsome, well-educated guy i discovered on Jdate, a favorite Jewish site that is dating. We delivered him a note, he replied — after all, Jdate said we had been a 98 per cent match — after which we talked in the phone and came across for lunch at a restaurant that is waterfront Boynton Beach. The date ended up being going well — so well he asked me away once more even as we strolled to the vehicles later. Then we uttered the expressed words i would come to be sorry for.

“My dogs would be very happy to see me personally once I get back home, ” we said.

“YOU HAVE ACTUALLY DOGS!? ” he shouted. (Yes, shouted. )

“Yes, ” we replied. “I stated that within my profile. And there’s a photo of me personally using the dogs. ”

He said“ I HATE dogs.

Making sure that was my very very very first and final date with the physicist that has felt therefore promising.

I’ve a lot more stories to even tell though We have actuallyn’t been dating for very long. Nearly all of those whole tales are funny; most are downright frightening. There clearly was the finance that is corporate whom seemed good but whom later on ended up to own been arrested for domestic physical violence. There is the retired new york police whom spent one hour speaking with his war stories about himself and regaling me. He didn’t ask me personally a question that is single myself. And there clearly was the advertising professional we came across for coffee with who I’d the following conversation:

“Your profile states you’re in marketing but doesn’t state everything you market, ” we stated. “So just what does your business do? ”

“This occurs when the majority of the women wake up and leave, ” he responded. “What’s the worst industry i possibly could take? ”

“Cigarettes? ” I inquired.

“No, ” he said. “I work with a gun maker. ”

I did son’t even comprehend there is a weapon maker in Southern Florida. I learned later that Florida has its own.

Becoming a person that is open-minded we stated, “Well, that’s just that which you do, right? It really isn’t what you are actually. I mean, would you go searching? ”

(I’m an animal that is big and tangled up in dog rescue. )

It ended up he previously a weapon secure inside the apartment, owned several weapons, including some frightening people, and did in fact get searching.